I am not sure if I attract weirdos, or if they just happen to populate in the areas I also spend time. A man with a white-blond ponytail and a dumb safari hat came into the liquor store and said something worthy of adding to my extensive list of "Creepy Things People Say When I am Trying to do my Job."
I'm not sure if the wink was meant to emphasize the beer, or to allude to something unspeakable.
He then told a joke that I half-listened to and did not completely understand. I gave a tiny laugh to which he said, "Well I thought it was funny."
Again, did not know if this was part of the joke or a sly accusation that I might not appreciate his sense of humor.
Guess what, guy? I don't appreciate your sense of humor.
And then later that night THIS GUY came in.
Why is he laughing at that? Is he planning something? I have never before wanted mind-reading abilities so badly, as I do when I encounter weirdos.
I do not want to be locked anywhere with these people. Because they will inevitably chain me to a wall. Especially the one who wanted to drink beer with me.
There is no escaping this. Probably.